Affirmations—Do they Really Work?
Our subconscious begins forming pathways and routines from the moment we are conceived. Research shows that even in the womb, we start developing traits, personalities, and behavioral patterns that shape how we navigate life. The quality of our childhood further reinforces these pathways, continuing to influence us as we grow. Ultimately, our subconscious mind shapes and influences our conscious actions
In The Biology of Belief, Dr. Bruce Lipton delves into the science behind this phenomenon, revealing how these early-formed pathways can be reshaped. As we mature, we may realize that the subconscious patterns developed in infancy, childhood, or adolescence are no longer serving our highest good. However, all is not lost—regardless of our upbringing, we have the power to consciously rewire our subconscious mind. By shifting our routines, self-talk, and beliefs, we can create new, empowering pathways that align with our true potential.
How do affirmations come into play?
Affirmations are intentional, positive statements that help rewire the subconscious mind, shifting negative thought patterns into empowering beliefs. By consistently repeating affirmations, we create new neural pathways that support higher energy, greater resilience, and a more positive outlook on life.
Affirmations are a powerful tool for transforming negative self-talk, rewiring patterns, and reshaping routines. In fact, we can literally reprogram our neural pathways through intentional affirmations.
Affirmations are affirming to yourself that you are capable of doing whatever you want to do!
I can already imagine your reaction—you’re probably laughing, convinced that affirmations are nothing more than empty, feel-good phrases that mean nothing to your conscious or subconscious mind. You might see them as rigid, black-and-white statements with no real impact.
But I’m here to tell you that affirmations can work—when used correctly. And I’m going to show you how they have transformed my own thinking patterns and routines, creating real, lasting change.
Affirmations for Negative Thinking
First, you need to become aware of just how much negative self-talk and thinking dominate your daily life. Once you start paying attention, you’ll likely be shocked by the sheer volume of negativity running through your mind each day. From the moment we wake up to the time we fall into bed, we are often stuck in cycles of self-judgment, criticism, and stress. Just thinking about it is exhausting! No wonder we end our days drained, frustrated, or snapping at those around us. These low-vibrational thought patterns weigh us down, depleting our energy and leaving our bodies sluggish and resistant to change.
But here’s the good news: awareness is the first step toward transformation. Once you begin recognizing these negative thoughts, you can acknowledge them and consciously replace them with affirmations that uplift and empower you.
For example, if you dread getting out of bed and your inner dialogue sounds like:
"Ugh, another brutal day of work, errands, and doing everything for everyone else."
You can flip that into affirmations like:
Getting out of bed is enjoyable and fills me with energy.
Each morning brings new possibilities and opportunities.
I embrace the day with ease and enthusiasm.
I am in control of my time and energy.
Setting healthy boundaries comes naturally to me.
I handle my responsibilities with grace and ease.
I connect with others in love and respect.
It’s a good day to have a good day!
I know what you’re thinking—"This feels so fake!" And yes, at first, it might. You may even feel silly repeating these affirmations to yourself. But I promise, if you stay consistent, something shifts.
For me, the change wasn’t instant or dramatic, but after a couple of weeks, I started to notice subtle improvements. Getting out of bed felt easier. My thoughts leaned more toward the positive without as much effort. And as my mindset changed, my days began to flow more smoothly.
It’s a simple practice, but its impact is profound. The more you train your mind to replace negativity with affirmations, the more you reshape your energy, your mood, and ultimately, your life.
Bridging the Gap of Affirmations
I will admit it is hard to go from, “I hate getting up in the mornings.” To “I am so excited to get out of bed.” So how can you bridge that gap?
I bridge that gap by slow walking myself from one to the other. You can call it the ladder approach or the slow walk approach.
For example:
✨I want to be happy when I get out of bed.
✨I feel like being happy to get out of bed.
✨I am happy to get out of bed.
Typically, I use all three at the same exact time but repeat it in this order.
➡️I want
➡️I feel
➡️I am
There are somedays that I can only get the “I want” affirmations out and that is okay! Do what feels comfortable to you on any specific day.
The Difference Between Toxic Positivity and Effective Affirmations – Balancing Realism and Optimism
Affirmations can be a powerful tool for shifting our mindset and rewiring subconscious patterns, but there’s a fine line between healthy optimism and toxic positivity. Understanding this difference ensures that affirmations feel authentic, supportive, and effective rather than dismissive or forced.
What Is Toxic Positivity?
Toxic positivity is the belief that we must maintain a positive mindset at all times, regardless of circumstances. It dismisses or invalidates real emotions by encouraging forced optimism, such as:
"Just be happy and grateful!" (while ignoring pain or struggles)
"Everything happens for a reason, so don’t feel bad."
"You shouldn’t feel that way—focus on the good instead!"
While well-intentioned, this approach can lead to emotional suppression, guilt for having difficult feelings, and a disconnection from reality.
What Makes an Affirmation Effective?
Effective affirmations acknowledge where you are while guiding you toward a better state. They balance realism (accepting your emotions and struggles) with optimism (believing in the possibility of change).
Toxic Positivity vs. Effective Affirmations
How to Make Affirmations More Believable
If an affirmation feels fake, adjust it to make it more realistic and achievable. Instead of saying:
❌ "I am confident and fearless!" (when you don’t feel that way at all)
Try:
✅ "I am learning to trust myself more each day."
Instead of:
❌ "I am wealthy and abundant!" (when you’re struggling financially)
Try:
✅ "I am open to new opportunities for abundance and financial growth."
By using gentle, progressive language (“I am open to…,” “I am learning to…,” “I allow myself to…”), affirmations become a bridge between where you are and where you want to be—without forcing toxic positivity.
A Fun Story About Affirmations
My son was paddle boarding and the breeze was a bit strong. When I started to get worried about him, I started walking the shoreline to look for him. Soon enough I saw him paddling as hard as he could back towards us. When he saw me the first thing out of his mouth was,
“Affirmations really do work Mom!”
I asked him what he meant and he said,
“I got stuck on the shore and I couldn’t get back to you so I started telling myself I could to do it and that I was strong enough and that I was capable. After I told myself those affirmations, I was able to do it!”
At that moment my heart was brimming with happiness and I was so very glad that I taught him about affirmations. Affirming your ability to do something really does work and is empowering!
Affirmations can really turn your day around. I challenge you that when you are feeling down try and find a positive affirmation you can use to turn the tide. They don’t have to be big or elaborate just a simple, I am beautiful, I am smart, I am capable, I am a good mom, my kids love me, I love my kids, I am a SuperMama! All these affirmations carry positive energy which in turn can help you turn your frown upside down.
How I Use Affirmations in Energy Sessions
During an energy session, I use affirmations when I sense that your energy could benefit from something more than just recognition. With the type of energy work I practice, I actively integrate these affirmations directly into your energy systems. Afterward, I send you an email with the list of affirmations I used, so you can continue reinforcing them daily. These affirmations help you affirm your worth, reclaim your power, and support whatever specific shifts came up during the session.
